--- title: Sleep url: 'https://www.merryquinn.com/posts/sleep' markdown: 'https://www.merryquinn.com/posts/sleep.md' date: '2025-09-16' description: "I never thought how fixing my sleep schedule could improve my life so much. It isn't an exaggeration to say I'm a different person now. It all began sometime at the end of the last month. I was anticipating my regular check-up by my GP, which has been postponed like 4 times because either they had…" taxonomy: tag: - ADHD --- # [Sleep](https://www.merryquinn.com/posts/sleep) 16th Sep 2025 [ADHD](https://www.merryquinn.com/posts/tag:ADHD#body-wrapper) ![PXL_20250916_185543587.webp](https://www.merryquinn.com/images/e/2/0/b/9/e20b9a8793d9a9c2798ea9ed1ff5cb825a13a6a0-pxl20250916185543587.webp) I never thought how fixing my sleep schedule could improve my life so much. It isn't an exaggeration to say I'm a different person now. It all began sometime at the end of the last month. I was anticipating my regular check-up by my GP, which has been postponed like 4 times because either they had a vacation or fell ill. Can't blame them for that; sometimes life just happens. I wasn't particularly in a hurry to get the appointment over with. Actually, that isn't entirely true. I wanted to discuss my suspicions of ADHD with them and ask them for advice on what I should do next. I'll cover ADHD in another post; let's stay on sleep for now. It was a Saturday night when I thought to myself. What if I tried just sleeping normally? What if I tried fixing my sleep before I bring up ADHD with my GP? Man, the first 3 nights were ROUGH. Those nights were painfully boring. I essentially spent about an hour staring into the ceiling and wishing my melatonin would start releasing already. Regardless, I pushed through (somehow), and by around the 5th night I started to feel naturally tired around 9pm. Which was a pleasant surprise instead of my usual "system crash" I had at around 11pm. You know what's interesting? That just after a few nights of a proper 8 hours of sleep, I felt like my brain got supercharged a little. Aside from mental clarity, I noticed something peculiar during my weekend grocery shopping. I did not feel the temptation to buy a shit ton of sweets as usual. I resisted the forbidden calling of the Coke machine on the way out. It's not that I stopped liking sweets or treating myself, but I now actually had some say in the decision process. I didn't automatically buy some overpriced caffeine sugar bomb out of habit. I was actually able to pause for a second and say to myself, "Do I really crave this overpriced insulin spike that badly?" The answer was no. The answer was usually a no, but when your brain is running on fumes, the prefrontal cortex responsible for decision-making is powerless, sitting in the backseat. Aside from the small win of resisting the sweets at the mall, I did a LOT of thinking that weekend. I hadn't had such a fruitful stream of thought in a long time as these. I can't say it was all fine and dandy, but I needed to have these conversations with myself. With that clarity, my thoughts wandered somewhere I'd been avoiding: money. I'm a little ashamed to say this, but I'm going to have to stay in my current job longer than I wanted to. Not by a ridiculous amount, but definitely a few more months than I hoped for. Man, I did so many impulse purchases... I don't regret virtually any of them because they are things I either genuinely needed or wanted. I'm just mad at myself I couldn't wait just a little longer before I bought them. Maybe fixing my sleep won't fix my finances overnight (wink wink), but at least now I know what the root cause of the problem was, and since then I've put a few guardrails in place. Another interesting thing I've noticed is that *days are longer*. Seriously, my sleep-deprived self could easily drift through the week without even noticing it was Friday again. Considering the circumstances, I'm both surprised and impressed I didn't royally fuck anything up. Not to say I have a *huge* responsibility at my job, but I still handle invoices and buy goods on behalf of the company. Anyway, back to *time*. It feels as if time itself stretched at least 3 times. As with everything, this change came with a few upsides and downsides. Major upside? Weekends are now a lot longer, and I can actually get shit done. Major downside? So are the weekdays now, but one other upside counters this pretty effectively. That being focus. I'm not gonna pretend like sleep *magically* fixed my ADHD symptoms, but it's easier to focus now. Not only that, but also remain focused for just a bit longer when needed. This means that I can much, much more easily get into *flow* *mode,* and the time starts sprinting away again. Last but not least, I feel happier now and less irritable. I wouldn't say I was feeling necessarily shit before, but I just wasn't myself. I could feel happiness, but not contentment. Easy dopamine in the form of Instagram or music with a greatly high BPM to get through the day. I relied heavily on either dopamine or cortisol to do virtually anything during the day. If there's one thing I learned, it's that sleep isn't just 'rest.' It's the foundation for everything else. Get that right, and the rest starts to fall into place. ### Music I enjoyed recently - [N.E.M. (GRAViiTY Remix) (feat. Las Aves)](https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=KEzswqekvNE) by GRAViiTY - [Sunglasses At Night](https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=3s8gihuoKx0) by Camo & Krooked, Tiga, Zyntherius - [I Was Made For Lovin' You (DubDogz, Bhaskar Remix) (feat. Nile Rodgers a House Gospel Choir)](https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=p7sgdGh6BKk) by Oliver Heldens, Dubdogz - [Trevor Daniel - Falling (Bacca Chew Remix) (Bass Boosted)](https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=cL4-YWStl3M) by Bacca Chew --- ## Navigation - Parent: [Posts](https://www.merryquinn.com/posts.md) - Previous: [Perfectionism](https://www.merryquinn.com/posts/perfectionism.md) - Next: [Hunter's brain](https://www.merryquinn.com/posts/hunters-brain.md)